Feb 15, 2012 12:00AM

Fucking James Franco

Short stories based on hypothetical sexual encounters with James Franco. (Not written by James Franco.)

Thank you, degenerate Portlanders at Social Malpractice Publishing, for crystalising the dirty dreams of so many in the written word. Fucking James Franco is a collection of short stories hypothesising sexual encounters with James Franco, described in the blurb as "the greatest American actor, writer, and visual artist of all time". That is some high praise (and not at all tongue-in-cheek).

"His hands instinctively balled themselves into fistfuls of the Mexican blanket and the force of his climax lifted him off of the couch as I struggled to swallow each new mouthful of his torrential cum. Eventually the explosions subsided and the tension ebbed out of him, his tired muscles easing him back down, his face painted with that shit-eating grin you've seen on Letterman or Conan."

That's an except from one of the stories, 'Web of Desire' written by Carina Louise and Micah Louis.

Read 'Web of Desire' in full, thanks to Gawker, or simply purchase your own copy of the book for a mere $15.00. While you're at it, why not accessorise with a matching limited edition silkscreened poster for only an additional $28.00? Pictured below, the highly covetable piece of contemporary art was designed by the book's editor Sean Joseph Patrick Carney.

socialmalpracticepublishing.bigcartel.com

Emily Royal